Communication, humorous, example of from Warriors' Experience

  • Communication, humorous, example of
  • Participation, humorous

Dear All,

In the interests of BREVITY and with a view to RE-SPECT I have come up with some responses that we can use in future when communicating with each other. These responses should also facilitate the participation of our ARTHRITIC spectators who would dearly love to write but lack the ability to do so! <wg>

RESPONSE # 1: Thank you for caring enough to give me your truth. I have taken it on board and will explore it fully. I WILL let you know what my explorations yield.

RESPONSE # 2: Thank you for giving me your truth. I have taken it on board but have YET to decide IF I will explore it. Consequently do NOT expect a response any time soon.

RESPONSE # 3: Thank you! I don't agree with you at all! Therefore I will NOT be taking this on board, let alone exploring it! Don't hold your breath waiting for a response!

RESPONSE # 4: From the bottom of my heart, thank you! Your email has caused me great pain, and before I can even think about responding I am going to crawl into a dark corner and eat worms whilst contemplating what a bad and evil person I am. Needless to say, in this state I can take nothing on board! If I ever do find my self-image again I will pretend that I never saw your email!

RESPONSE # 5: Thank you so very much for the huge clarity you have brought me here! I can now so clearly see ALL of my folly, and it leaves me in disgust at myself! I have ALREADY transmuted these shortcomings into unconditional love in action for myself, for the whole world, and even for YOU! Words do not express how humbled I am at being the recipient of your truly warm and beautiful message!

RESPONSE # 6: Who asked YOU anyway, dipshit?! Have you BOTHERED to look in the mirror? So why don't you get your OWN act sorted out BEFORE you come and tell ME what to do?! Let me give you a few pointers in looking at your OWN act: Defensiveness, closed and not listening. Resistant to true learning. Arrogance. Self-importance and self-pity. Aggression!

RESPONSE # 7: Fuck off! I just so happen to LIKE my self-image and my view of the world, and therefore it is YOU who just INSIST upon NOT wanting to HEAR me! I know EXACTLY what I want from the teachings, and it certainly does NOT include emails from aresholes like you! I appreciate that MY approach may be the UNKNOWN to you, but you are so CLOSED to anything other than your own opinion that you simply cannot stop meddling in other people's lives! Get lost!

RESPONSE # 8: You arrogant imbecile, WHO gave you permission to stand on MY soapbox? Pontificating and telling other people what to do is a gift that you do not have the ability to handle! When you do I will let you know!

RESPONSE # 9: Your message just oozes MOTHER! We are all working so HARD on achieving inclusiveness on this e-forum, so how DARE you sow DISSENSION amongst us by questioning my behaviour? What is your REAL motive? Are you wanting to put me in a bad light so that everyone starts PICKING on me? I will NOT dignify your message with a response! I am standing FIRM in my OWN knowledge, even IF it KILLS me! Next time I see you I am going to slap you!

Now to demonstrate how you should use these 9 Universal Responses in the Art of Selective Perception, known as REASONING the Riddle of the Reptile, I will include below an example of this popular art!

Looking forward to a much more RESPONSIVE e-forum! <ebwg>
With much love,


Dear X,

Response #3.