Remorse, versus regrets from Warriors' Experience


  • Remorse, versus regrets
  • Regrets, versus remorse

Question:

Théun, can you please speak to us about regret? I have many regrets in my life and I would like to know how to view these differently.

Answer:

REGRET is a very big word, my friend, and I wonder if you have TRULY asked yourself how YOU de-fine this word BEFORE taking upon yourself the RESPONSIBILITY inherent within even USING this word? We ARE the PRODUCT of our speech, remember? But, if you like, I will share with you.

So far in this lifetime I have had my FAIR, meaning EARNED, share of success, and therefore I FEEL I have no cause to piss and moan! :) And yet, :), I have also had my FAIR number of failures! <g> By this I mean that in being a pioneer and an adventurer at heart I have always been a dare devil, and therefore when someone tells me it CAN'T be done I prick up my EARS, and when the odds AGAINST me APPEAR to be IMPOSSIBLE my blood quickens! :)

But in having such an approach towards life can I afford to be a romantic and idealistic fool? No, of course, not! Therefore in tackling the "impossible" adventure I go in there with NO EXPECTATIONS, other than I am going to give this my ALL, for better or for worse! Knowing that the odds against me are impossible I am NOT expecting to win! But I would also be an UTTER FOOL if I were to embark upon an impossible battle with an attitude of ALREADY being defeated even as I enter into battle! Some of these battles I have won, others I have lost! But when you KNOW that you love to tackle the impossible is it REALISTIC to believe you ARE going to win? No! :) I do what I do, simply because I WANT to do it, simply because for me it has HEART to do it! Therefore win or lose, I have DONE what I WANTED to DO with every fibre of my being and from the bottom of my heart! Therefore do I have REGRETS? No! Given even HALF a chance I would fight ALL of my PAST and PRESENT battles again and AGAIN, for to me they have HEART and I BELIEVE in them, even those battles already fought and lost! :)

Do I suffer from REMORSE? Oh, yes, my friend! Many, many times do I experience the excruciating pangs of sheer remorse! Not remorse because of having won or lost battles, but remorse in LEARNING day by day how MUCH I STILL fumble with my OWN learning, a fumbling that impacts upon ALL around me! But do I REGRET the mistakes, the fumbling and the failures? Oh, no! To do so would be ARROGANCE personified! :) On the contrary, I can hardly believe my incredibly GOOD FORTUNE at having been granted, what to me, is the truly priceless PRIVILEGE of being able to walk this earth as I strive to LEARN all I can, all I have time for! So for me remorse comes when I am FUMBLING and seeing the clock ticking away the MOMENTS that I already know are NOT coming back! It is then that I experience remorse, a deep gut-wrenching pain at seeing how my ineptness IN the moment is causing precious time to slip through my FINGERS, time that can NEVER be regained!

But regrets? No, my friend, I have NO regrets! For me REGRET is hell on earth! For me REGRET is KNOWING that you COULD have succeeded if only you had WANTED to TRY, and yet, for some stupid REASON, you NEVER did try!