Remorse, versus embarrassment from Warriors' Experience


  • Remorse, versus embarrassment
  • Embarrassment, versus remorse

Question:

What is the difference between remorse and embarrassment?

Answer:

The most important thing to grasp with respect to REMORSE versus EMBARRASSMENT is that REMORSE is a state of SELF-LESS-NESS one achieves once one can begin to see how one has genuinely "wronged" another being! In other words, one truly feels the futility in desperately WANTING to turn back the clock and to do it differently this time round. But in knowing that this is not possible one is overcome by that sense of hopelessness born of futility, and therefore knowing that one is just going to have to live with the consequences of one's past actions. But in that moment there is NO thought of self, but only a very deep desire to somehow make it better for the other person!

The folly in this lies in the fact that we can NEVER make it better for anyone, whether "wronged" by us or not! And this is why I stress the word "wronged" in inverted commas. There are NO victims in this world, and neither are there any victors! It takes TWO people to tango, and therefore it takes BOTH people concerned to set up those circumstances that EN-ABLE them both to learn what they most need to learn! It takes both the "wrong-doer" as well as the "wronged" in order to set up the EQUATION that is of benefit to them both! From this it is not so difficult to see that REMORSE only comes about when the two factors in an EQUATION have not been EQUALISED. Unless BOTH people take from a challenge what each of them NEED, one of the two people concerned will always feel remorse in one way or another!

Embarrassment, on the other hand, has nothing much to do with learning, for embarrassment has its roots in self-importance. The only real learning that CAN be taken out of being embarrassed is learning that being identified with one's self-image and view of the world IS just STUPID! And it is one's sense of stupidity that brings about the embarrassment!