My struggle for years was/is around this question: How to be most deeply involved into something, running at full speed on a mission and yet be free from it?
I tried ALL kinds of behavior patterns and tried setting my mind on a direction, on the task at hand, on the journey, on some distant goal or on my understanding of what is my script for my life is. But what I found out is that setting my mind on any-THING eventually leads to sense of missing something or being incomplete if not outright unworthy.
After I got tired of finding THE right place for placing my mind, and I tried very hard, LOL, I started to suspend mind and rather let my feelings to explore and wander around getting here and there until I would stumble on something that feels true. This way many new riches came to light, I started to feel more real and not bound.
So when I saw this quote, it was absolutely spot on!!
Why do I find it so difficult to find value within myself?
Whilst we IDENTIFY with the FORM-side of life we can NEVER find value in ourselves! Why? Well, quite simply because the FORM has NO PURPOSE of its own OTHER than as being a VEHICLE for the INDWELLING LIFE! So, whilst you CONTINUE to try and find VALUE within yourself as a lawyer, as a wife, a husband, as a sister, as a brother, as a friend, as a mother, a father, as a daughter, a son or whatever else you can THINK of, LOL, you are ALWAYS going to feel UNWORTHY! Why? Because you are NOT any of these FORMS you utilise through which to LEARN to give EXPRESSION to, and thereby to EVOLVE the REAL you, the spirit being that INDWELLS this FORM you have IDENTIFIED with as being you! And you know what? There are very FEW forms within life that CANNOT be CRITICISED when COMPARED with other forms!"
This quote brings a deep sense of peace and meaning. It is also very poignant and liberating :).
Man of Action