Tonal, the island of the, transformation of from Family Posts

  • Tonal, the island of the, transformation of

“The only worthwhile change there is, is to change our knowledge of self, a change we initiate with recapitulation, and through the insights gained from our recapitulation, coming to the point where we realise full well that the only way forward is to erase our personal history by stalking our perception of self, which by definition means not-doing.“


“True knowledge is to experience the inner Self”

Not doing starts in normal awareness. In simple words, in my experience it is to NOT allow the mind to close and form conclusions and opinions. It is a constant stalking of this habit of the mind. There comes a moment when realisation downs - the rational mind IS a closed loop as this is its normal nature. But because of this constant stalking, the identification with the rational mind is no more and the true mind is experienced.

After this experience, believing without believing and accepting without accepting, begins to be a natural approach. The inner Self is felt and the feeling good about the Self is always there as a constant background.

Then, dating with the Self begins - a constant re-specting and the re-specting becomes essential to the stalking of perception. By re-spect here I mean an inner movement to go deeper, to look again deeper.

In this process of dating the Self, the little fire that I expressed as feeling good about one’s Self is constantly blown and blown, so the fire naturally grows. I was using the energy of identification to unite with this fire.

The warrior’s shield should be constantly on because on such a journey, wonderful experiences, dreams and visions come. Here I may add that ruthlessness is essential, otherwise the identification with the wonderful experiences on this journey arrests the process. Let’s take an example of my experience with bliss. And here I do not mean just feeling good but a bliss - the whole body radiates with bliss in the embrace of the Self. It is super good and lovely - a dream come true. In this state, I could not operate normally but I did not care.

However, as I said I felt that I needed to continue, otherwise I will be stuck. This intent to continue is very important also because after the experiences of bliss are gone, one might feel very down. AND this intent then helped me to focus even more on stalking the perception and so another dimension of the background which is the Self, was revealed - the dimension of inner silence and stillness. Suddenly, this background behind every perception and experience, was alive and sort of tangible. The internal dialogue naturally started to fade away and to die out.

In this state of affairs, living the Teachings became in a real sense the most important priority in my life. There is one crucial point here. On one hand, I felt strong and stable while on the other, I started to experience the limitation of my human resources. That is, I saw clearly that only by myself, I could not do it. And yet, the momentum of striving and living the Teachings as priority was enough to propel me further and deeper. The only viable option in this moment though, was to set my intent on the real and total change. This was the only thing that did make sense since I had tried and explored so many possibilities already.

However, in this leg of the journey I gave up every hope - internal and external. Only the bare intent for total change was left. And this was the actual crucial point.

Once this was done, and after some time, there came an experience that was very strange. It was so gentle that firstly I did not so much noticed it. However, when I realised that something had changed, I looked deeper and then all of a sudden, I snapped out from the identification with the form (body/mind). This snapping out was more like sliding in a new perception that was so gentle and yet irrevocable. I not only experienced the Self but also realised that I AM the Self and that I have always been. The nature of the Self is Awareness and is actually impersonal.

Of course, the journey continues but in a very different way. For example, the Self is the real not-doing hence the experience of interacting now is felt in a very different way. There is a constant presence in my daily life that is silence and peace beyond understanding. I see some old habits are still here but there is not the old identification in them. So it is a question of extracting the trapped energy from those habits and use their elements for new forms of expression, if necessary. Some habits just need full dissolving.

Man of Action